AGE How to make a king smile, or a president, or a CEO, or a newfound friend: "After years of trying to put people at ease before an interview, I have found the perfect solution. You shake hands, take a step back, look the person in the eye, and exclaim with astonishment, "Why, you look so much younger than your photographs!" It works every time. The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles." Sigmund Z. Engel As quoted in Newsweek July 4, 1949 "Every age has a keyhole to which its eye is pasted." Mary McCarthy (1912-1989) American author, critic As quoted in Forbes July 26, 1999 "Age is not particularly interesting. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough." Groucho Marx (1890-1977) American actor Groucho and Me "I don't generally feel anything until noon, then it's time for my nap." Bob Hope (b. 1903) American comedian As quoted in the International Herald Tribune August 3, 1990 "When you are younger you get blamed for crimes you never committed and when you're older you begin to get credit for virtues you never possessed. It evens itself out." I. F. Stone (1907-1989) American journalist As quoted in the International Herald Tribune March 16, 1988 "A man does not get old because he nears death; a man gets old because he can no longer see the false from the good." Charles Bukowski (1920-1994) American author Screams from the Balcony: Selected Letters, 1993 "The older you get the stronger the wind gets--and it's always in your face." Jack Nicklaus (b. 1940) American athlete As quoted in the International Herald Tribune February 28, 1990 "A man has every season while a woman only has the right to spring. That disgusts me." Jane Fonda (b. 1937) American actress As quoted in The Daily Mail September 13, 1989 "The businessman is the person to whom age brings golf instead of wisdom." George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) Irish playwright "When I get up in the morning the first thing I do is read the obituaries. If my name's not in there, I shave." George Burns (1896-1996) American comedian Bernard Baruch at a press conference on his ninety-fifth birthday announced that during the next year he'd learn to speak Greek fluently. A reporter asked: "Mr. Baruch you're ninety-five years old. Why would you want to speak Greek now?" He replied: "I am ninety-five years old. It's now or never." "Buy old masters; they fetch a much higher price than older mistresses." Lord William Maxwell Aitken Beaverbrook (1879-1964) British financier, statesman, and newspaper owner "Why can't life's problems come to us at eighteen when we know everything?" Anonymous "Growing old is no more than a bad habit which a busy man has no time to form." Andre Maurois (1885-1967) French biographer and novelist "To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am." Bernard Baruch (1870-1965) American statesman and financier Speech, November 1960, Overseas Press Club, New York City "Age does not matter if the matter does not age." Carlos Pena Romulo (1901-1985) Philippine diplomat, educator, and former president Speech upon retirement from the U.N. When Somerset Maugham was recuperating from the flu an admirer called and asked, "Could I send you fruit, or would you prefer flowers?" He was eighty-eight years old. He told her, "It's too late for fruit, too early for flowers." W. Somerset Maugham (1874-1965) British author When I made my debut as a twelve-year-old in Berlin, people used to say, "Isn't he wonderful for his age?" Now they're beginning to say the same thing again. Mischa Elman (1891-1967) American violinist, born in Russia On his 70th birthday Chauncey Depew met Mary Garden, the Metropolitan Opera star who had a figure equal to her talent. Seeing her in a gown of pronounced decolletage, he asked her what keeps her dress up. She replied, "Two things: your age and my discretion." Chauncey M. Depew (1834-1928) American lawyer, legislator, orator "I always wake up in the morning a young man." Carlos Pena Romulo (1901-1985) "I do not feel any age yet. There is no age to the spirit." "Children are a great help. They are a comfort in your old age. And they help you reach it faster, too." "How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?" Ruth Gordon (1896-1984) American actress, playwright "Nothing is free. Even age. Age is the fee God charges for life." "You can take no credit for beauty at sixteen. But if you are beautiful at sixty, it will be your soul's own doing." Marie Stopes (1880-1958) British advocate of birth control You know you're getting older when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope (b. 1903) American comedian "One of the many things nobody ever tells you about middle age is that it's such a nice change from being young." Dorothy Canfield Fisher (1879-1958) American author "Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art." Garson Kanin (b. 1912) American author Excerpted from The Speaker's Book of Quotations by Henry O. Dormann All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.
